Happy New Year! It’s 2015 and you’ve picked your resolution for the New Year!
You haven’t felt fulfilled at work for a long time now. So you’ve resolved to finally answer the question you stay awake in bed thinking about: What do I really want to do with my life? What career will make me truly happy?
2015 is going to be your year. You’re going to figure out what you want to do, and then, somehow, you’re going to find a way to make it happen. You’re committed. You want this. You’ve wanted this for years. You know 2015 is going to be your year!
You’re wondering where to begin. You’ve read What Color is Your Parachute? and countless other books promising to help you figure out the best career for you. Yet, you’re still not sure what you really want to do.
Before you start taking action, looking for a new job, planning your escape route, it’s time to get clear on the positive, inspiring vision you’re looking forward to bringing to life. It’s time to figure out what you really want to do with your life.
In this article I’m going to offer a few prompts to help you think about this question in a new way. My hope is there’s at least one that you haven’t seen before that will give you the jump start you’re craving.
But first, imagine this…
Like Picasso said, the meaning of life is to find your unique gift—that thing you do that lights you up, that you feel good doing, that utilizes your unique strengths and talents. But that’s not all Picasso was saying. He’s also suggesting that life cannot reach its full potential if you know your true gift but do not share it with the world.
Your job is not to live anyone else’s life. It is to give yourself room to live yours! Your job is to let yourself live YOUR life.
Before I offer prompts to help you figure out what your true calling really is, three quick notes to help you get the most out of this article:
1) As you get started, it’ll be important not to limit yourself to thinking just about your career. In this imaginary future you’re going to start envisioning, you’re living a whole life you absolutely love! So try your best to think more broadly than just career.
2) After you read through these prompts you’ll see that I recommend getting started by using just one or two of the prompts.
3) You’ll see that after I offer up prompts to get you mind going, farther down in this post, I offer tips on how to actually begin working with them. In my work with my coaching clients I’ve found that this process seems deceptively easy, but can instead be quite challenging for most people. After all, if figuring out what you wanted to be doing with your life was easy, you’d have figured it out years ago!!!
6 Prompts for to help you start envisioning a life you love and discover the career path for you:
Prompt A: Imagine yourself 10 to 15 years in the future, living a life you truly love…
- What are you doing?
- What are you thinking about?
- How do you feel emotionally, physically, spiritually?
- What else is happening in your life?
- For what do you feel most grateful?
- Where are you?
- Who, if anyone, is with you?
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Prompt B: If you knew you could do anything, and you were guaranteed to succeed, what would you do?
Prompt C: What is the number one thing you want to have happen in your life in the next 10 years?
Prompt D: Imagine if all of a sudden you found out you only had one year to live… What would become your highest priority?
Prompt E: If you were forced to take a year off, to spend a year away from family and friends, from your home and your routine, and you were given an unlimited budget, what would you spend your time doing?
Prompt F: What if there was one thing you had to do for at least 3 hours a day, every day, for the rest of your life? What’s one thing you can imagine maybe making the cut?
Once you find one or two that feel like they suggest taking a perspective you haven’t yet taken, here are 7 Steps to help you work with the one or two prompts you select:
1. Before you get started you may find it helpful to pull out some plain paper, lined paper or a journal, pencils, pens, and markers. Imagine if you were about to run a meeting and ask everyone present to just start brainstorming. Bring out all the “tools” you’d offer to help get brains going and help loosen things up enough to start playing with a whole range of ideas. This is what you’ll be doing as you get started—playing. You don’t need to find the answer during the first 10 minutes you sit down to respond to your prompt. In fact, you probably won’t. Your objective is to let your mind play, to let yourself imagine possibilities.
2. Use a prompt that feels fun for you, a prompt which you started to answer as soon as you read it, so you can create a positive atmosphere in which you can do your visioning exploration. This process can feel exciting, inspiring, filled with hope and possibility. It can also feel scary at times. So, I can’t overstate how important giving yourself freedom to just play and have fun will be at this first stage. If there are prompts that feel harder, there’s no need to use them. The old adage works here: take what you like and leave the rest.
3. As you imagine your vision becoming real, allow yourself to be in the scene, to imagine it has already come true. Allow yourself to feel yourself in your imagined future. Allow yourself to believe it’s possible, even to believe it’s already begun to happen. This is the place where you’ll spend a bulk of your time. Don’t be fooled by the easy explanation. Really let yourself spend at least 20 minutes on this one!
4. Notice any negative thoughts that come up when you first start imagining a potential future for yourself. It’s important that you not judge yourself for having negative thoughts. It’s natural that they come up. Your task at this point is to notice them. Notice any thoughts of self-doubt, second guessing, self-judgment, worry, fear, half-empty thinking, etc. Here are a few common road blocks many of my clients choose to set aside:
- But I don’t know how I’d ever be able to do this
- I’m not good enough
- My partner/parent/child/friend/colleague wouldn’t like this
- I don’t know if I have what it takes to do this
- This feels impossible. I’d better not get my hopes up.
- But I already spent all that time and money to study and work in a totally different field
- I’ll never be able to make a living doing that
Visioning is the first step in choosing a career you love, in building a life you find truly fulfilling. Once you get clear on what it is you want to do with your life, then the work will become figuring out what it will take to get you there. But you’ve got to do this first step first.
5. Create a container into which you’ll be able to set aside any negative thoughts that happen to arise. This can be as simple as taking a piece of paper, writing “Negative stories I want to let go of” at the top of it, and then recording any negative thoughts that arise on that one sheet. Or, like some of my clients choose to do, you can use an old tissue box as your negative thought “trash can.” Anytime a negative thought comes up, creating a container like this will allow you to acknowledge it, write it down, and then release it by putting it to the side into its container. (For more on increasing positivity and releasing negativity, check out my blog post on 7 Steps to Becoming a More Positive Person in 2015.)
6. Create a reminder for yourself of why you’re choosing to do this. What’s your motivation for trying to figure out what will make you feel truly fulfilled in life? Is it that you don’t want to feel like you’ve wasted any more time?
Your reminder might end up looking something like one of these:
- The how will come later. Right now I need to focus on what I want. Once that’s clear, I promise I will figure out the how.
- I will take action. I just need to do this first.
- I don’t want to waste time heading in wrong direction. Life is too short.
- I have to go all in. I have to dream big! I saw what happens when I don’t let myself and I don’t want to do that anymore. I’m done with that. Now I’m choosing to put everything I’ve got into trying to build a life I actually really love.
- I don’t want a quick fix. I’m going to put in the work because this time I want the real thing. I want the next steps I take to be towards a career that will last!
Create a reminder that works for you. Write it down. And put it someplace where you won’t be able to ignore it!
7. Respond to the one or two prompts you select in any way you’d like. Just let yourself experiment and find a way that feels fun, inspiring, and energizing for you. Scribble down freely associated thoughts, talk to yourself out loud, draw stick figures, type up a list, play on your computer in Word, Excel, or PowerPoint, move your body, shake things up. Do whatever ends up working for you. You may begin to think about the exercise as creating your very own recipe for the secret sauce you might use to create a life you love. Find what works for you and go for it!
If you notice yourself resisting the visioning process, if the idea of “dreaming” seems frivolous, or if you notice yourself doing anything and everything you can before sitting down to get really clear on exactly what it is you want, (i.e., taking out the trash, watering the plants…) try thinking through these journaling prompts:
- What is the point of figuring out my dream? Of figuring out what would bring me deep and lasting fulfillment?
- What’s in it for me if I put in the effort now to figure this out?
- What’s the risk if I don’t do this work?
- What’s the risk if I do put in the time to try to figure this out?
- What about doing this feels scary?
- What’s holding me back?
- What’s making it feel easier not to do the visioning work?
- Do I truly want to figure this out?
- If I do want to figure this out for myself, what am I going to do to make sure I see this through? What actions will I take today and this week to propel me forward along this soul searching journey?
- What do I need to remind myself of every day in order to feel motivated to see this through?
I wish you the best as you embark on your vision quest! It may be a bumpy ride. But I encourage you to stick with it until you find your answers!
Leave a comment and let us all know what ends up working for you, where you hit road blocks, questions you have, new prompts you’ve designed that ended up working better for you.
These steps won’t work immediately for everyone. If you find yourself getting stuck at any stage, reach out. I’m happy to help you get to the next level!
~Becky
Becky Emet, MSW, MBA
Career Coach | Life Coach
Choose A Life You Love founder
Email Becky today to schedule a FREE coaching consultation to learn more about how coaching can help you choose a life you love at info@ChooseALifeYouLove.com
